I should be excited and hopeful, but I'm not. I'm moving into a new place, a bigger place (slightly), a nicer place (assuredly, once the ghastly red living room and bright yellow kitchen are painted over), and a closer-to-work place. One of my dearest friends will be moving in next door. Our dogs are friends. We work together. We are starting out with new homes, new romantic interests (not in each other), and all-around new-ness.
I should be happy, but I just don't feel it. I feel nervous, apprehensive, and scared. I feel sad and lost. I don't know what is going to happen next and I don't have enough wine in my house.
I feel a deep sense of loss that I was not expecting. I love my neighbourhood. I love living close to S. and R. This is a big change and I didn't expect it to happen so fast. Although I am finally feeling "settled in" at my job, it's still a "new" thing... there is so much in my life that is changing. It's a lot of change to process... and I don't think I've fully computed it all yet.
It's raining again and I'm out of wine.